All my life is yours

Who decides what is right and what is wrong? Who decides which nationality, which religion, which skin color, which appearance, which love is the right one?  Exactly nobody has the right! Because at the bottom of our hearts we know that we are all the same and yet different. We share the same planet, the same air we breathe and are connected by seas, rivers and lakes. Nobody has the right to condemn, marginalize or abhor other people because they speak a different language, belong to a different nationality or love the same sex.  I am of the opinion that everyone has the right to love whoever they want, because giving and receiving love is the most beautiful thing in the world. Shouldn't it be due to everyone who deserves and really appreciates it? I think so. Isn't it an advantage to let people of another nationality into one's life with another language? Don't we benefit from it? We can learn from one another, support and help one another. Wouldn't life be colorle...

As you read this, you might be wondering, "What do I deserve?" I will tell you... You deserve to be loved every day for being who you are. You deserve to live in a world that accepts who you are, what you do and what norms and values ​​you represent. You deserve to be told every day how beautiful you are. Both inside and out. You deserve to be respected. No matter if you are a man, a woman, diverse, a child, a teenager, an adult ... no matter what and who you are. You deserve it. You deserve to be shown the same loyalty that you show to your fellow human beings. You deserve not to be judged for mistakes, but to be given the chance to make up for mistakes. You deserve to be accompanied on your path by people who mean well with you. Such people are called friends. You deserve to find true love if you appreciate it too. You deserve that all of your wishes and dreams come true. You deserve to be fine every day and to fall asleep worry-free. You deserve so much that I cannot list ...

Life can be so unfair, mean and hard. I speak from experience. Because for the last four years I've literally been going through hell with my family. It all started in January 2017. My mom had a doctor's appointment there because her right armpit was swollen and it hurt. That worried us. That is why we wanted to have it clarified so that we are calmer and have certainty. That's why we went to this appointment. Then the disaster took its course. Diagnosis: malignant tumor (also called breast cancer). For us the world stood still. The head was full and yet so empty. We felt nothing and yet so much. So many questions went through our minds like: "Why mom?", "Why now?", "How long do we deserve this?", "Is there a way to treat it?", "How long does she have to live? "," Has the tumor spread? "... So many questions and no answers. You feel so helpless and deceived. There have been ups and downs for four years. More lows t...

Really a complicated thing. Because lust can be felt without love. But lust will never be so beautiful and satisfying when yours is satisfied by the one who genuinely loves you. It is even better if you get pleasure from the one who loves you. Because then it is real, perfect and pure. But lust is not just the sexual part. There are so many facets of lust. The need to be hugged, to feel the other without sexual intent. To be so close to the other that no one can separate you. That not even a piece of paper fits between you. Just to feel the other and to know that nothing can happen to you, nothing can separate you. You are the only thing that matters in this moment. That is the desire for physical closeness. Then it is the desire not only to feel that person and to know that he is there, but also to feel it. To feel how the person who sincerely loves you pays homage to your body. With every touch of his hands, his lips, his tongue ... So that you have the feeling you are the most beaut...

You are perfect, just the way you are! Believe me To be honest, it makes me angry that people have such power that it makes other people feel like they are worthless. Who decides about the value of a person / human life? It really pisses me off. Because every human being, every living being has the right to live. To live the life he wants. Why do you have to prove yourself to other people every day? Why do you have to show that you have a right to your life every day? Why? Everyone was born for a very specific reason. We don't know that in advance. Only life and experiences show what one is meant for. Be it to be there to help others to go a certain way or just to make the world a better place because you live in it. Who knows?! Thats right... nobody! So please never feel you are useless, unwanted, worthless. Because there is at least one person in the world who is made for you, who loves you just as you are. Who accepts you just as you are. Who wants you just as you are. Who loves...

No matter what I do, how hard I try, it's always wrong ... Why am i not good enough?  I am honest with you. At the moment when I write this, I am not fine. I feel misunderstood and not valued. It makes me sad that I actually want to cry. But I don't do that. Because who cares how I feel? Why cry and reveal my true feelings when there is no one who can and will help me? Why cry when nobody cares? I constantly have the feeling that I am not good enough, that I am not worthy of being spoken to, of trying to understand me, of asking how I am really doing.  But why is that so? What did I do that I deserve all the hatred and misunderstanding? I do my best every day, try to please everyone, forget about myself. No matter what I do, I feel like it's not good enough. Although I give more than I can, I tear myself apart, almost burn out. But it's never enough... No matter what I say, it is often misunderstood. Then I am labeled as arrogant, selfish, mean or rude. Although I am no...

Where are you? How I would like to be with you. How I would like to be in your arms now. How I would like to feel how you hold me and to know that you are there and catch me when I fall. How I would like to feel your breath on my skin. Feel your breath all over my body. And to know that your breath is going faster because you want me. How I would love to look into your loving, honest, warm eyes. And know that these eyes do not perceive other women, because these eyes only see me, because I am enough for you as I am. How I would love to touch your lips, taste them and kiss them, because I know every word and every sentence you say is meant honestly and appreciatively. 'Cause I know these lips can't lie. How I would love to feel your lips on my body, the desire when you explore every inch of my body. How I would love to feel you just to know that you are really there. That I am not just hallucinating and that you are a dream that will never come true. How I would love to spend ev...

Who decides on "beauty"? What do we mean by "being beautiful", "being attractive" or "conforming to the norm"? The ideal image of women is to have the body size 90x60x90, to be super thin, to have long legs, long hair, not to have a gram of fat too much on the body, otherwise one would have lost control of one's life, cook, wash and clean to have no wrinkles, no scar that could disfigure because it "doesn't look nice", great big but not too big breasts, a firm buttocks and and and ... And a man is "only" attractive when he is trained through, has a sixpack, when he is at least 1.85 cm tall, with little body hair, is the biggest asshole in the world, shows no feelings, is always strong and the woman shows where to go? But that's not real life. Nobody is perfect. Every detail, every difference, every supposed mark makes us an individual. Makes us unique! I love it when men "are not the norm" when they are ...

If I asked you, "What is your heart doing?" would you reply immediately, "it is beating" or "it is pumping blood". I'm right? The answer is not wrong. You are right about that statement. First and foremost, the heart is there to keep us alive by allowing blood to circulate in our body. Our bodies are supplied with blood, nutrients are transported and our circulation gets going, etc. But if you answered this question: "What is your heart doing" not with your mind, but with your heart and sometimes inside yourself, you would definitely answer differently. If I had to answer this question with my heart, I would answer that on the one hand my heart is fine. Because I have people around me who understand me, who make me happy every day. Who are always there for me, no matter what situation I am in or what state I am in. Because I can and may do a job that fulfills and makes me happy every day. Because I am completely healthy again, without restric...

Sibling love is something special. But having a twin is something completely different. I speak from experience. Because I have both, siblings and a twin sister. She is 22 minutes older than me, which she always holds against me 😅. But that's okay. Because I would never want to miss her in my life. Because the strong bond between twins cannot be described. It exists, but no one can see it. Only twins can feel it. This invisible bond is your loyal companion and your connection to each other. Because as crazy as it sounds, I can tell when my twin sister is not doing well. We can be separated by continents. If something is wrong, I usually know before she does. Declare me crazy because that's what it sounds like. But a bond between twins is something supernatural and can only really be modeled by twins. They say so beautifully, a twin does not come alone. And that's true. Because where one twin is, the other is not far away. Because only together do you feel safe and complete...

Hearts broken because of love take time to heal. Because every wound that was left is deep. This takes time, patience, understanding and love from the right person in order to be able to heal completely again.  If you love a person unconditionally, you give this person your trust, your loyalty, your valuable lifetime and your inexhaustible love. You give yourselves to the people without any evil ulterior motives. But is there a guarantee that these people deserve everything you give them, is worth it? You never know in advance. Do you take the risk to find true love and possibly be disappointed, hurt and emotionally kicked? How to treat dirt and how to be thrown away because you are interchangeable? I would say yes. Because the most beautiful thing in the world is love. Unconditional, honest and true love. Nothing and no one else can give you this feeling. It feels like flying. You feel soothing and light as a feather. Nothing and nobody can harm you. You are strong in every situat...

Do you respect yourself?  Do you love yourself the way you are? Are you proud of yourself every day for what you do every day?  Do you appreciate yourself Can you look in the mirror every day and think, "Wow do you look good today!"?  Are you always true to yourself and do not pretend to please others?  If you answer these questions honestly, you may see how negatively you think of yourself every day. But why is that so? Has it always been like that? I think "NO" it wasn't always like that. That comes with age, with all the pressure from society, you have to conform to an ideal in order to be "liked" and "recognized". To be "seen" and "perceived". Everyone who is different, thinks differently, looks different, is of less value in this society. Which is sad.  After all, aren't people just committed to this and fight for diversity, respect, charity, and acceptance of every human being? Actually, one should think society ...

When I was waiting for my mom in the car in front of the oncology department, I noticed a man. He was in his mid 40s, I would guess, long, brown, wavy hair and a baseball cap on his head. He was waiting under the roof of the entrance because it was raining very hard.  He was always nervous and excited going up and down the entrance area. Always looked at the front door. As if he was waiting longingly for someone very special. He walked up and down the entrance area, up and down again for at least 10 minutes.  Until he stopped with his back to the front door and checked something on his cell phone. Suddenly the doors of the oncology department opened and an older woman in her early 70s came out. Shoulder-length, white hair.  She looks around and sees this waiting man. At that moment when the older woman steps out and he noticed her, time has visibly stopped for both of them. They only had one eye on each other and otherwise they no longer saw anything.  He hugged the ...

My dear future love,  it is pouring rain outside and I am writing this letter for you in the hope that you will read it. I don't know WHO YOU ARE, I don't know WHERE YOU LIVE. But I know that my heart only beats for you. Every heartbeat, every breath and all of my time is just for you. My whole body is full of love waiting to fill you. Every part of the body, every cell and everything I have to offer is distorted after you.  My eyes only see you. My arms want to hold you tight. Never let you go again. Every unspoken word is waiting to reach your mind and fill your heart with all this love that cannot be put into words.  I know I'm not perfect and never will be. But I am the purest, most honest, most faithful and most loyal soul that you have ever met in your life. I can guarantee you and I will promise you that i will love you forever.  No matter what happens. In all the ups and downs of our life. I will always be by your side, always empowering you and encouraging y...

The sun shines through the green of the trees, straight into my face. I close my eyes and enjoy the warmth that the sun leaves on my face. I sink into the soft and green grass and take a deep breath. I breathe the fresh, pure and clear air while everything is peaceful around me. The temperature is pleasant and there is a mild wind. I listen to the rustling of the leaves and perceive the chirping of birds and the chirping of the crickets. Everything is so calm and harmonious.  No stress, no hectic and no responsibility that I have to follow. Just me and nature. Now I open my eyes to the bright, blue sky and discover a few beautiful weather clouds in the sky. Butterflies flutter around me and the bees buzz as they collect nectar and fly from flower to flower. The mild wind blows through my hair and brushes my sun-warmed body. I enjoy the greenery around me. No matter where I look, it's green everywhere or all kinds of flowers are in bloom. That's why I love to live here.  Everyt...

When you die, what do you take with you?  In life, it's mostly all about how much money you earn, how successful you are, which car you drive, that you own your own house, have the newest cell phone, wear the most expensive and newest clothes. Many use it to define themselves and their lives. But does that really count? Is all of this important? Or aren't there more valuable things in life? How to have a full life, to spend the time that has been given to us with the people we care about. To enjoy life as best you can to the fullest? Doing the job that gives us pleasure, no matter how much money you earn because you do it out of passion? Coming home every day because you know who is waiting for you at home, no matter how expensive the property was or you live in an apartment that is in the poor district? Doesn't it all come down to all of these beautiful moments that you have in the course of your life? All the experience you get? All the feelings you share with loved ones?...

Please read this blog through to the end. You will then understand why ... Do you know the feeling of being ripped off by your own partner or by people you blindly trusted? Isn't that a nice feeling? Don't you feel valued, safe and loved there too? What if he / she cheats on you and drops you like dirt? Don't you also have the feeling that you are valuable and special? Or if he / she tells you that he / she is still in love with his / her ex? Doesn't he courage you and makes you the happiest person in the whole world, because you are so easily replaceable? It is not bad, is it? Are just some insignificant feelings from someone else. You can trample on it and step on it. It is best for you if you always get the feeling that you can never do something right. I love that the most. Because this perplexity and this self-doubt that you have, only make everything better. You feel so comfortable in your own skin and don't want to cry. All of this strengthens your self-confi...

Unfortunately there are far too many people who act selfishly. Who are gleeful when something bad happens to you.  Such people are a dime a dozen. But always keep in mind: "Not all are like that!" Ignore those who don't mean well and focus on the really important people in your life.  Sort out the ones who harm you, who stop you in your actions and prevent you from acting out. Because these people are not worth all of your time, love and energy.  Appreciate those who support you, who move you forward, who are interrested in your thoughts and feelings. Who take care of you! Because these are the ones who make you happy at the end of the day. Because that's exactly what you deserve! By Miss Sunshine - August 09, 2021

Things we have never said usually weigh heavily on our hearts. They are always present in our minds. We keep weighing the pros and cons. Whether consciously or unconsciously. They accompany us on our way. They influence our actions and our actions. Until it is too late and the right time has passed ... Therefore always be honest and open towards your fellow human beings. Tell them what you feel! Be it telling the person how grateful you are or the three magic words "I love you". Because if you think about the moment too long and it passes, you will regret it for a lifetime and wonder how life would have gone if you had the courage. And that makes us unhappy! You deny yourself a happiness that was meant for you just because you are afraid of the result. Because let's be honest ... what have you got to lose? Even. Nothing. You can only win. Because every time we dare to do something, we are brave, we grow a little bit inside and are proud of ourselves because we have dared ...

Sometimes I feel lonely. Sometimes I feel helpless. Sometimes I feel broken Sometimes I feel worthless. Sometimes I feel invisible. Sometimes I feel ugly. Sometimes I feel betrayed. Sometimes I feel used. Sometimes I feel betrayed. Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve to be loved.   Who feels that way sometimes? Who feels addressed? Unfortunately, it is human and "normal" that we sometimes feel that way. But don't let these thoughts anchor. Because there should be no reason for that. Because everyone is good the way they are. There are people who love you, who care and take care of you. There are people who value you and accept you as you are. There are people who cheer you up on bad days and are there for you. In good times as in bad times. There are people who show you that you are worth more than those ugly thoughts that make you feel like you are not worthy.   YOU ARE MORE THAN YOU THINK. LOVE YOURSELF, NO MATTER WHAT OTHER SAY! The people who are good for you ar...

Why do we try so hard with people who are not serious about us, who play with our feelings and don't give a shit about our well-being? There are people who don't deserve all this effort! Because if a relationship, be it a friendship or a love affair, is nurtured and sustained by only one person, it will not go well for long. Because this one-sided relationship is always doomed to failure. Because at some point even the most understanding person on earth will no longer have the strength to maintain such a relationship.  Because waging a one-sided fight is tiring and exhausting in the long run. It is nice that there are people who worry about others, who make an effort and give everything for them, but that doesn't make you happy in the long run.  Because at some point you get the feeling that you are just being exploited. To be worth nothing not important. And in the end, you wonder why you are even alive when everyone doesn't care how you are.  Because you are only good...

Today is again one of those days of the year, which unfortunately has a negative impact. Because exactly 20 years ago around 3000 people lost their lives. And why? Because of a terrorist attack on the World Trade Center in New York. But why does all of this have to be? Isn't there already enough suffering and misery in this world? Why are wars waged? Why are there terrorist attacks? Why are there attacks? Isn't that bad enough already? Why do you have to repeat the mistakes from the past? What motivates people to do such bad and fatal things? I can only shake my head uncomprehendingly ... Because of such people, families have lost their relatives, people have had to lose their lives. Have people lost their way because they couldn't cope with this tragedy and couldn't deal with this bad day or people didn't even have the chance to live their lives! Be aware that your actions have consequences. Not only for yourself, but also for the people around you ... In memory o...

Our eyes meet. The desire for one another can be felt in the air. It's like being electrically charged. It literally crackles. We are getting closer and closer, but our eyes do not lose each other. The only thing that matters is you and me. Everything else is unimportant.  We face each other. Slowly, very slowly, our lips approach. At first they touch each other very carefully and delicately. But that doesn't last long. Because our longing for one another, the need to feel each other is far too great.  Now we are so close together that nothing can separate us. Our hands explore each other's body. Our kisses become more passionate and explorer. Our breathing is now irregular and intermittent. Just feel the mutual and the kisses are enough to fulfill us. And cloud our senses.  I gather all my willpower and reluctantly break away from you. Then I take a step back and look at you. I take your hand and lead you to the bed. As you sink down on the bed, I look at your masculine ...

2 months earlier Her breathing is slower and irregular. The only sounds you can hear in the hospital room are the humming and beeping of the devices and their breathing, which is stabilized by the devices. I hear her lungs rustle when she breathe. She breathes in ... nothing for a long time ... then she breathes out again. It goes on like this all the time. Day and night, week after week. It's dark here in the hospital room. Very dark. Although the weather is beautiful outside. It's the beginning of summer. The sun shines with the smile of the people in competition. But since the cancer advanced, it can no longer tolerate brightness and noise. Because with all the medication her body concentrates on the essentials and thus goes into energy-saving mode. Only the lighting of the devices illuminates the room and does not make it appear quite so lifeless. She has only recently been dependent on the equipment in the hospital. And all because the doctors treating them have previously...

Humanity wants to be lied to. I've seen this so often and experienced it myself. Because if they ask you for your honest opinion, they'll be offended or mad at you. Though you knowingly didn't do anything wrong.  Because many people always say they value honesty. But that is not the case. Because then they would have to admit that they are not perfect, not flawless and vulnerable. But what's wrong with that?  All of this makes you an individual, your own personality, something unique and special!  Isn't it enough that the world is becoming more and more unreal and false? All the media trying to convince us that we are like us, are not okay? Nobody would love us as much as we are because we have cellulite, our bodies are not well trained, we are too big or too small? Why do we have to adapt to “the norm”? Is it really all about being supposedly beautiful (from the outside), lying in people's faces, even though you have a completely different opinion because you w...

I feel paralyzed. My mind is working clearly, but my body does not want to function. I feel like I'm dying alive. I watch my body getting weaker and weaker every day and I can't do anything about it ... Because my body is too weak from all the treatments. My body is useless. I am useless. Just a cover that can no longer be used for anything. Why is my mind still alive when I'm no longer of use? I vegetate to myself day after day. I'm just a burden for everyone who takes care of me, who sacrifices all their love, time and strength every day to keep me alive. Why am I so selfish and do this to them? Isn't it best to stop? To end my life here and now? In order to no longer be a burden and to put an end to misery? Isn't everyone happier then? Without me? All problems would be solved in one fell swoop! But what about me? Do I want the years of struggle to be in vain? Would I like to give up so easily and give up cancer? Is my life already over? Do I not have a right ...

The sun is shining in the blue sky. Not a single cloud can be seen. The birds chirp their most beautiful songs and the fresh wind blows my hair in my face. I close my eyes and breathe the fresh breeze deep into my lungs. Around me there are people talking, laughing and enjoying life. People who go for a walk with their dog and children are not aware of the games and all the problems in this world. Everyone is fine. Nobody pays me any attention. Because from the outside, I'm fine. I smile at the people who come towards me, return the greeting when someone greets me in a friendly manner. I exude a calm and balanced aura. Everyone around me feels good. But am I really as good as it seems? Am i lacking for anything? Am I so happy and balanced or is there a crack in my facade? Because inside it can look different in a person. The first appearance may be deceptive. So take a closer look. The greatest sunshine you know, it can sometimes feel bad even if it doesn't look like it at firs...

Love doesn't care how much money you have. Because no money in the world can pay you real, true and unconditional love.  Love doesn't care what gender you are. When a man loves a man or a woman loves a woman instead of "normal" as it is "normal" for a man to love a woman. Which is completely idiotic! Because everyone should love the one they want to love. This is what love stands for!  Love doesn't care about the color of your skin. Love doesn't care about your nation or origin, love doesn't care about your culture and love doesn't care about your age. Because love is unconditional without claims and without asking questions.  Love is such a beautiful and precious thing, nobody should have a say and interfere. Because in the end, the most important thing is that two people have found each other who can open up to the other without prejudice and without bad thoughts, get involved with each other and let themselves fall.  Because they know who ...

When life tires you and you don't know what to do, it can be pretty shitty ...  Each of us has phases when everything is going great. At work, you are liked by your colleagues, everything is going according to plan and you enjoy going to work. Always with a smile in your face. Without having negative thoughts. You are motivated, exude a zest for life and have a lot of energy.  You can regulate everything and master everything without any problems. It's the same in private life. Nothing can get you down or throw you off course. There is someone waiting for you at home who loves you unconditionally. Be it your own family or your partner. You float as if on cloud 7. And that's how you go through life. Without worries, without problems. Always positive and happy.  But unfortunately there are also phases in life when none of this is tangible. You feel powerless, empty and see no meaning for your existence. Why am I alive if no one cares how I am? Why do I make an effort every ...

When a hearse comes towards you, what do you feel at that moment? What are You thinking about?  At first I am sad. Because at the moment when I drive past the hearse and breathe and enjoy my life, some other person had to leave his place on earth ...  Whether voluntarily without pain or due to his age, which is also tragic but far from being. I think it's as bad as involuntary due to an accident or an assassination attempt.  Death is always cruel because it leaves a great gaping void in all the hearts of those who survive. And to let this hole heal completely again is not an easy task.  Because this special place that has now become free in your heart cannot be occupied by any other person. For everyone you love, you wish that death would come quickly and that death would not have to suffer.  Because NONE deserves a painful death. And all of these thoughts go through my head in seconds, although I don't even know who the person is. I never got to know the person...

For my better half! ... everything has started. My personal gift was born with me. To be exact 28 years ago!  The nine months before I was lonely with you, hidden under cover under Mama's heart. At first it was not clear to anyone that the world would be enriched with two children. But at some point it came out that two little hearts are beating under Mama's heart. Yours and mine!  After the nine months of "probation" we were released into our beloved freedom to enrich the world with our uniqueness and our big heart and hopefully make the world a little bit a better place. Because you are a gift only through your presence, sister heart. You are the best gift that life could give me.  Because we understand each other blindly. No matter how many kilometers separate us, I know you're always with me. And nobody can take that away from us! With you I get stupid thoughts. With you I can be who I am. For you I am like an open book that only allows you to dive into my wor...

Tears run down her cheeks, all hope is drowning after so many weeks. The pain is written on her face, i want to wipe them away with a single gace. 'Cause to see such a strong woman tormented,  not everyone can handle that .  The same shit day after day,  no doctor knows the way.  So much suffering and so much pain,  my heart breaks completely one day. But it can all be so bad,  I adjust all my strengths day for day for that.  'Cause together we'll be your enhancer,  and conquer this cancer.  I will never give up hope thats why i pray down on my knee,  because without hope what kind of life would that be? So always believe in what's good for everyone,  that should be your cornerstone. I know it's easy to talk, its not easier than taking a walk. By Miss Sunshine - November 16, 2021

You say you know me Are you sure of that? Or do you just think you know who I am? Because maybe I'm not who you think I am. But should I tell you something? I don't care what you think you know Because the people who are really interested in me and my person don't have to tell me to my face that they know me. You don't have to use it to make yourself feel better. These people who really know me know how I am, what I feel and what I think. They know what my life looks like, which fates I live through and which demons I have to fight with. They don't kill me and take advantage of my vulnerability and my sensitivity. They strengthen me and help me up. And don't leave me lying around and step on me like a piece of dirt that is not worth taking care of. So are you sure you know me I do not think so. So don't talk behind my back pretending you know me. Because in reality it would be your wish. But unfortunately I don't want to have anything to do with such men...

                           ...DESTROY ME! Looking back, the last days and weeks have shown me how much I can count on you and your support. It's a blessing! Which fills me with pride and happiness. This feeling of knowing someone like you by my side cannot be put into words. Because to get this honor, to enjoy your trust and to feel your support every day is priceless. Thanks for that! I have never met such an honest and pure person (both in heart and in head) like you in my life. Please keep this always. Because that is a gift that not everyone has. Because many are blind to the essentials ... There has never been anyone in my life who saw through me so quickly. Who grasped and understood my feelings and thoughts as quickly as you did. You instinctively know what to do and that amazes me a lot. Because I never let a person get so close to me that they can read me like an open book. But you did it! But to be completel...

I believed every single word you say. But every single word you said was a lie! I enjoyed every single moment with you. But none of them were real. It's all just a sham made of lies! I have absorbed and immortalized every single moment of you. But none of it was real. All just smoke and sound. With every gesture and with every "dear" word you wrapped me up, paralyzed me and won me over. But everything was a lie. Nothing was real. All just poison that is supposed to break me piece by piece and then should be docile and then break very slowly.  But I was blind to it and trusted you again and again. Always given you a new chance. And you? Played with me Broken me piece by piece and threw all my individual parts in the dirt and trampled on them as if all of this was worthless. I saw all of this as a token of your love, but you mocked me and talked about me from behind. Offended me badly, criticized me and didn't accept me for who I am. And yet I would help you up every t...

Ask yourself a question: "Are you perfectly happy?" and if so, "Can you be perfectly happy?" and "What does it mean to be perfectly happy?" In my opinion, I would say that I am not perfectly happy and never can be. Because a person who is perfectly happy does he still have dreams and desires that he can and wants to strive for? Because if you take a closer look at the word desireless, there are two words in it. The word "wish" and the word "go". The word "wish" shows that striving for something new and striving for something that one has not yet achieved. This shows the will and the desire to be alive. The thirst for life that one feels. Because you enjoy everything you get to know again or to relive something. But if you put this in connection with the word "go" all of that is called into question. Because "no wish" means that you have no more goals, no dreams that you want to realize and everything is mea...

Why is it so easy for people to leave me behind? For me all of this can hardly be put into words. Every time I let people into my heart and each time they enter it again. I keep trying to trust. But how is that supposed to work without completely messing up my life? Because obviously everyone is going their usual way. Why am I the one lying broken on the floor? Many tells me be strong, nothing can knock you off so easily. But sometimes I find it difficult to build on my own strengths. Since when have I been such a battered and broken soul? The silent cry for help has been in my throat for a long time. But nobody wants to hear that's why I don't want to bother anyone. But why is there nobody there for me? Because I´ve always been there for others. Why can't I be valuable? Because my feelings and thoughts are always so pure. How am I supposed to trust anyone else? Without looking back at the past? I always try to look ahead without suffocating again. In all the man-made lies....

If I didn't exist, would it make a difference? If I didn't exist, would anyone miss me? If I didn't exist, would people have fewer problems? If I didn't exist, how fast would it go before I was exchanged? If, if, if ... 😣💔 So many "ifs" and yet no answer. But on days like today, I would have liked to answer. Because I feel like I am meaningless. Because people pass over me like I don't exist. I've seen people come and go this year. And all those who have left my life have had no problem leaving me behind. It felt more like they were shedding a burden that had lasted for years. And that's not a nice feeling. Because through such people I always have the feeling that I am bothering and annoying others with my mere presence. This is probably not the case. I am probably even loved for who I am. But I'm too scared to trust it. Because a person who is injured and broken every time anew becomes more anxious and unstable. He begins to doubt himself a...

Would you like to know what I feel about you? My Eyes have a never-ending lust of capturing your elegantly moving pictures every single day. A Picture of you smiling endearingly right infront of me at one of many lame jokes I make. A Picture of you laughing delightfully, when I make a stupid face when that joke misfires. A picture of you making those adorable cute face and reaching your arms out to wrap me and cheers me up.  A picture of you making those sudden cute dance moves while mumming a song. A picture of you blushing a little after noticing you’ve been caught by my admiration. A picture of saying “oh, you’re so cute” every single time I do something extremely usual like holding a chair for you, for making sure you don’t fall AGAIN! A picture of you asking “What?” everytime I get caught smiling at you. A picture of you smiling back with nodding your head like you already understood everything despite I answered “nothing…!” There’s a lot of pictures already, still my eyes wan...

Tears of joy roll down your cheeks as we meet for the first time. This brings me to tears and touches my heart because I know you are actually a person who does not reveal his feelings to everyone and rarely cries. So on the one hand I feel very honored that you trust me so much and show me your true feelings. That you are who you want to be without caring about how you have to be. You feel free as a bird and don't hide from me. Because isn't the most important thing that you can be who you are in a relationship? Is it even loved and respected? That there really is a person who was just waiting to meet you and spend his life with you? As if it was all predetermined by life. That everything works its way so that the two halves eventually find each other when the time is right. And then you can share such a beautiful moment together, such as a long-awaited first meeting where two lonely hearts have found each other after a long search and wait and they can live the life together ...

All only see your external beauty ...  ... your breathtaking animal brown eyes,  ... your beautiful lips that invite you to kiss,  ... your perfect face without a flaw,  ... your great and heavenly hands,  ... your attractive body,  ... your pure manhood  ... and and and But none ...  ... sees the sadness and pain in your eyes,  ... sees the countless scars on your heart,  ... sees the deep gaping wounds in your soul,  ... sees the struggles you had to go through. NO ONE sees all of your suffering!  Nobody can or wants to look behind your facade. Because then they run the risk of having to think about their own life or of feeling their own feelings, which they may eat up. You'd rather be emotionally blind and overlook everything ...  But one thing is certain: I will NEVER be like this! I want to be there for you! Share your pain! I want to help you heal! I want to be there to save you! I NEVER want to become emotionally co...

I know all that you won't believe me, because it is unimaginable for you that someone thinks like that. Yet it is the pure truth. I feel very honored and blessed that you feel all that you have written to me and that I convey and give you all of this. That you feel so safe and secure with me, so that you can always tell me the truth at any time, because you know I understand you and do not judge you. And I hope that will always be the case. But to be honest, I'm scared of all of this. I am afraid of being hurt and disappointed. Not because of you and everything around, but because I know I had to take a lot in life if I thought that life meant well with me. That's why I've become more careful, which is not always good. I am afraid that I will not be able to live up to all of this. That all that I am for you is just an illusion in your head and as soon as we see each other for real, that you are disappointed. I know you say I can never let you down However, I would like ...

If I have to "bake" my dream man, he would be just like you! He would have your appearance, your character and everything that defines YOU. Your dear and faithful eyes, they can drive you crazy. Your sensual and full lips, if i should meet you in real life somebody has to catch me if i pass over. Your aura and your charisma reach me through each of your pictures, you're so beautiful you don't need a filter Your way and your way take me on a wonderful journey every day. Do you think you are not special and do not deserve to be loved? Thanks to God you exist and are here on earth! I don't want to miss you Because without you life would be crappy. I really hope from the bottom of my heart that we will meet someday and never let go again my love! By Miss Sunshine - February 14, 2022

My biggest fear is losing you. Because if you should go, you will take my heart with you and everything else that I give and will give you.  However if you ever leave me I will let you go. Because there is nothing more important in life than your happiness. And if you find your happiness without me I will be very sad that I couldn't give you what you deserve. But I'll support you and clear your way if it's the only thing I can do.  But until then, I'll give you all you deserve and pray it never comes to that. That you won't be taken away from me again. Because someone like you only comes along once in a lifetime. I'm glad to call you mine. Therefore I will cherish and nurture our love.  Giving us the time we need to let our love flourish. Because there is nothing better in life than being able to spend the rest of my life with you.  You are my personal sweetheart. I WON'T let you go for anyone. I'm so so so sure about that. I have only two reasons for th...

I'm just an image of myself. The shell still exists and keeps appearances. But no one notices what it looks like inside. 'Cause I've become a master at keeping my broken heart in the plain sight of humanity. Because any cry for help from my soul is ignored. It's getting more and more loaded on me. It doesn't matter if I can still handle it or not. Every "STOP" and every "NO" is ignored. My heart is just an organ that keeps me alive. It constantly pumps blood through my system to accomplish any task or challenge I am given. But to be honest, what is it all for? Why keep something or someone alive that is just "an object" anyway? If nobody cares how you are doing, why should you still live? Oh yes, that's right... you have to make life hell for someone! There must be some idiot to bully and boss around! Isn't it sad that a human life, a good soul, is worth so little? By Miss Sunshine - February 22, 2022

What would you do? Would you sacrifice your liver or kidney if you were asked? Would you rather go blind or not hear anymore? Would you amputate an arm or a leg? Rather the right or the left? Would you sacrifice your brother or sister? Would you leave your mother or father? Would you stop eating or stop breathing? Would you never go to sleep again or die now? Would you cut yourself off from everyone to support world peace or not? Would you give up your true love to make it possible for other people? Would you... If you had to choose what would you do? Not an easy decision right? Because everything is essential to life that makes YOU. Everything is necessary to make you happy. Because all of that makes you special and enriches your life. That's why I wish you that you never have to choose. Because a person is guaranteed to ALWAYS be injured and that is YOU! Because inevitably part of your purpose in life will be taken away from you. That will make you unhappy in the long run. So... ...

I close my eyes and imagine... ...as we sit together on a park bench and let the warm rays of sunshine shine on our faces. We hold hands and sit very close together so that nothing can separate us. We look at each other dreamily and tell each other stories from our past together. A smile steals onto our faces. We don't perceive the noises around us. Because at this moment only one thing counts and that is WE! Knowing that we could have a future together warms my heart and makes me happy. It gives me a goal worth fighting for. But it also makes me a little sad, because unfortunately I still have to wait for this future... But isn't it always the case that you have to wait what feels like an eternity for the best things that happen to you in life? And the wait was more than worth it, because you got exactly what you always wanted. In this case love for life. Your reason why you wake up every morning with a smile and why you fall asleep happy every night. Isn't it worth waitin...

Death looks at me every day where love once lived. To see you like... this breaks my heart 💔 because all the life energy has been sucked out of you. You're too alive to die but too sick to live. What kind of irony is that? What an injustice! The last few years we've been struggling to survive all the energy, hope and pain we've felt to help you survive, was it all for nothing? How can life be so cruel? From a second we had to say goodbye The hope and the belief that everything will be better went through this door with you. 10 days of fear, crying, breaking, rebuilding, finding new courage... were the worst I have ever experienced.  And all my fears came true. The door opened and the Death looked at me. With a sunken face, an emaciated body and deep lines of suffering. Hardly any strength to walk, no energy to breathe. With every second you walk along the tunnel and the last spark of hope goes with you. All we have left is a miracle that everything will still turn out for ...

Outside it is cold and wet, the sky is colored in various shades of gray and everything is so dark and dreary. There is hardly a ray of sunshine in the sky. The dark season begins. This also affects our mind ...  This is the time of the year that we feel lonely most of the time. Nobody understands us, nobody is there to listen to you and understand how you are.    We're drowning in our sea of ​​emotions. So many emotions, feelings and thoughts flood us and we don't know how to get out of this vortex alive. We feel like we're drowning in it. No saving hand in sight to help you out again.    But someone manages to get you out of there and takes the time to be there for you and to hear you, it is usually difficult to put everything you feel in words. Because you can't always explain what you're going through.    Sometimes it just helps when you know there is someone by your side who will fight all your shadows with you, so that sunshine can come into your...

You are my daydream, my nighttime fantasy. You are the sun that gives me warmth and the moon that gives me light at night. You are the air I breathe every day and the blood that flows through my veins every second. You are my heart that keeps me alive and my soul that keeps my inner balance in tune. You are the rain that removes every drought and gives life back to everything. You are the hope that everything will get better and that every obstacle can be overcome. You are like day and night to me because I know you are always with me. You are my friend, my partner, my blood and my love. Without you I wouldn't know where I belong, because you are my home. Without you, life would only be half as beautiful, because you are my better half who makes life worth living. Without you, the world would be missing an important part, because you enrich the world with your being. Without you my hope for love would have been lost long ago, because I had almost lost hope. Without you I would lack...